That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Randomize