omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize