How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Just cropdusted the office
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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