She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
