Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Randomize
