I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
