so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Randomize
