Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Your cock deserves a montage
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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