I CAN MOONWALK!
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Randomize
