My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
