Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
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