Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
