singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
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