Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Text me some of your sweat
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