he told me I talked like a deaf person
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
