but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
