There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
