I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
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