Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
I forget how to act sober
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