Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
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