Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
