your thong is hanging out like whoa
You don't have asthma, your pregnant
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Randomize
