i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
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