living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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