He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Randomize
