oh god the rape fog is back!
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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