Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
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