take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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