well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
