i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize