we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
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