yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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