Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
You made out with two different species that night
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
