You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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