Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
