After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
