He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
