I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
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