how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
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