we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
