I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Screwed.edu
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
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