No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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