What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
My hand turned me down
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
