This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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