you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
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