I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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