Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I'd cum for enchiladas.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
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