You made me cry and you don't even care
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Randomize
