YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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