They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
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