It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize